Okay, so this day was not as good as I hoped.....but tomorrow starts a new week. Ben was supposed to leave 6 a.m. tomorrow for Colorado. He asked me if I was okay with him going and I answered "Yes" although I was shouting "No" in my mind. I didn't mean to lie to him, I just
wanted to be okay enough for him to be able to go. It killed me to watch him packing has bags this afternoon. I finally fessed up a few hours ago that I am not okay.....and he is staying here with me this week. Total Relief!
I really thought I was tougher. I have surprised myself with the weakness that I feel. I keep telling myself to "buck up" but it's not working. I'm just so glad that I have Ben here to help me through this. I really didn't think I could love this man more.....but it has happened. He has truly taken care of me.
I'm going to run tomorrow. I can't wait. I think it will be very therapeutic.
2 comments:
Glad to hear that you are having absolutely justified, normal feelings! You know me-I always worried that I wasn't handling things the "right" way, but my best friend always told me there was no "right" way. You are handling things exactly as God intends for you to...He never gives you more than you can handle and He helps you handle what you are given!!! Talk to you in the morning!
I am glad you were able to tell Ben the truth and that he is standing by you and taking such good care of you!!!
I hope that each day gets better for you. God will continue to watch over you and guide you.
You are doing a great job...
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